America: Do whatever the fuck you want because America
#or just throw it all into the harbor
Does anyone actually follow that ettiquette in England?
Because my understanding of tea ettiquette in England is: OFFER YOUR GUEST TEA AS SOON AS THEY ARRIVE - GIVE THEM THE LARGER MUG, BECAUSE THEN THEY CAN HAVE MORE TEA IN IT, AND MORE TEA IS BETTER - OFFER THEM MORE TEA AS SOON AS THEY HAVE FINISHED THEIR MUG OF TEA, BECAUSE MORE TEA IS BETTER.
IF SOMEONE LOOKS STRESSED, OFFER TO MAKE THEM TEA. IF SOMEONE LOOKS UPSET, OFFER TO MAKE THEM TEA. IF SOMEONE LOOKS TIRED, OFFER TO MAKE THEM TEA. IF SOMEONE HAS JUST COME IN FROM THE RAIN, OFFER TO MAKE THEM TEA. IF SOMEONE HAS JUST RECEIVED BAD NEWS, OFFER TO MAKE THEM TEA. IF YOU ARE WATCHING TV WITH SOMEONE AND THERE IS AN ADBREAK, OFFER TO MAKE THEM TEA. IF YOU ARE MAKING YOURSELF TEA, OFFER TO MAKE EVERYONE ELSE TEA. IF SOMEONE IS NOT CURRENTLY HOLDING A MUG OF TEA, DOUBLE CHECK THAT THAT IS AN INTENTIONAL STATE OF AFFAIRS, AND THEY DO NOT, IN FACT, WANT A CUP OF TEA.
^ MY PERSONAL TEA POLICY
Adding to the immediately-above:
Ditto for Ireland. Additionally, in some parts of Northern Ireland: WHISKEY alongside the TEA. (And possibly in some parts of the Republic as well.)
- Anyone who sets foot in the house is offered tea.
- Anyone inside the house who’s (a) under stress or (b) assumed to be so is offered tea multiple times until they say yes.
- Anyone working outside the house on your property, for however brief a time, is offered tea. Again, until they say yes (because work is universally presumed to be stress).
- Home baking of whatever sort beats biscuits.
- Biscuits along with the tea are better than just tea.
- But just tea will do.
Wash, rinse, repeat. :)
PS: Cool kettles are cool. We have Sherlock’s kettle, so our tea is better than usual. :))))
once upon a time my mother and i shocked an english friend with the quantity of tea we drank. we’re in the american south so it was both iced and hot in large quantities. i believe it was the sixth announcement of “i’m putting the kettle on. you in?” that particular afternoon that stunned the englishman. it seemed it hadn’t occurred to him that americans’ could drink that much tea.
Reblogging for comments. Because, yes: MORE TEA IS BETTER. (I like teacups and saucers, but more in a this-is-playing-at-teaparties way. Not in an everyday ALL THE TEA kind of way. That is what mugs are for. Lovely lovely mugs. My favourite mug at home is a bone china Slytherin mug, but generally I default towards nice sturdy mugs that feel good in my hand AND HOLD LOTS OF TEA. Possibly with amusingly geeky decorations on them. But definitely with lots of tea.)
Also, posh tea is nice (I am currently drinking some rather lovely Rose tea, for example) but “tea” means builders’ tea: ie normal tea from a teabag, with milk. Although not, in my case, with sugar. Usually. Unless it’s proper Arabic mint tea, which never tastes right without a buttload of sugar. Or…I could go on about this all day. But basically ALL THE TEA.
My default mug for coffee is my Wonder Woman one.
My default mugs for tea are these 1970s avocado and mustard Corelle things that my mother probably got for her sisters (to match the ones they had), that I absconded with, because TEA MUGS LIKE THE ONES MY AUNTS USE, BECAUSE ALL TEA REQUIRES A DASH OF CHILDHOOD NOSTALGIA TO MAKE IT TASTE EVEN BETTER.
Preferred consumption method = with tinned milk and sugar.
My mother always has a pot on the back burner, and lord knows, when I’m up in the Interior, I drink a ridiculous amount of the stuff.
However, not so much at home, for some reason. Unless someone is dying or in hospital. Then I tend to burn off my nervousness and stress… making tea.
Yeah, I don’t recall anyone in England giving a fuck about the orientation of your spoon, or really not giving you your tea in a mug, nor any shopkeepers in Morocco getting pissed about when you started talking price (especially since they brought it up, not us), so I side eye the whole of this just in case. Will ask some co-workers about the India thing.
As far as tea and me, I bought a ridic Breville tea maker a couple months ago, and now I need one in my kitchen forever, because all tea tastes better, and tea is now a constant. Good lord. Delish. And it makes tea on the clock! Time for my morning dose of Jasmine Green Tea, by the way.